Staying Connected

https://www.goalcast.com/2017/07/12/these-5-things-are-what-keep-couples-connected-strong/

A common tendency in life is to be inner focused. The natural man wants to be self-involved and concerned for his/her own well-being above any other. Within marriage, this perspective can spell disaster. In order to maintain a successful marriage both spouses must be turned toward one another. They must remain engaged and interested in each other's lives. But how?

One way is to look for ways to change ourselves. Instead of pinpointing irritations in our spouse, Dr Goddard explains that we must try to have a "mind of Christ...We can see our spouses with compassion instead of irritation." (Goddard, p. 77)

Secondly, share our appreciation for our spouse. When we choose to appreciate rather than criticize we are strengthening the bonds between us instead of tearing them down. (Goddard, p. 78)

Third, enjoy the little things. It is through small moments that marriages remain strong. Grand gestures or lavish vacations are nice but they don't supply the backbone to keep a marriage in tact. We need to look for ways to fulfill the "bids" our partners make. Spouses who have "A tendency to turn toward [their] partner [develops] the basis of trust, emotional connection, passion, and a satisfying sex life." (Gottman, p. 87)

Through faith in the Savior Jesus Christ we can improve ourselves. To succeed in marriage, one must be committed and humble. Jesus Christ is the best example of this. When we come to know Him, we will better understand how to magnify our call as a wife/husband and mother/father. The trials we face will give us renewed perspective. With an eternal perspective we can see a struggle for what it is- an opportunity to grow. The sealing covenant made within the temple will also help us to better grasp the importance of our marriage. Through participation in those sacred ordinances, a husband or wife can remain steadfast and will look for ways to serve their spouse and family. Understanding the temple covenants helps us remember our purpose here which will help us endure through trials in partnership with our spouses. We do not need to endure alone. 

REFERENCES

Goddard, H.W. Drawing Heaven Into Your Marriage (2009). Cedar Hills, UT: Joymap Publishing.

Gottman, John. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work (p. 88). Potter/Ten Speed/Harmony/Rodale. Kindle Edition.